Hello my lovelies... How has your week been so far, I hope it has been making sense o? If it hasn't, just hang in there it will fall in place in time.
So today is SERIES TUESDAY, we'll be concluding our discussion on insecurity {click here to read the previous discussions} and we'll be highlighting a few steps to OVERCOME INSECURITY.... so as always, sit tight, read, learn, comment, share, and most importantly ENJOY.....
It's a known fact that insecurity is a natural part of everyone's life, we deal with insecurity at some point or the other; no one is immune to it. But in daily life, being too insecure to attempt even small tasks, such as speaking honestly to friends, limits your ability to enjoy the time you have on earth. Life is constantly changing and anything that is stable today may be broken or gone tomorrow. But if you make yourself powerful, you can always rebuild, overcome, and keep moving forward by your own will, and find happiness wherever you go. I looked on Wiki How for tips to overcoming insecurity and here are some of the tips I got;
Overcoming insecurity is divided into two parts;
- Practice Being Objective;
if you’re
feeling like you can’t accomplish something, take a step out of yourself for a
moment, imagine yourself as a completely different person and then tell yourself
what you would tell another person in your situation.
- Write Down Your Fears;
I have a book like this with a table, on one side are the things I wish and
hope to accomplish, and on the other side are the things I’m scared of
encountering on the road to accomplishing those things. Whenever I accomplish
anything, I write somewhere around the accomplishment, DONE.
- Remember All Of The Success You've Had;
- Ask Yourself, "What's the worst that could happen?" ;
- Now Ask Yourself, "What's the best thing that could happen?";
This is
something insecure people don't do nearly enough. Let's say you're nervous
about going on a first date with someone you're set up with. The best thing
that can happen is that you and the person hit it off, and begin a meaningful
and satisfying relationship. Isn't this worth going on the date for? Though the
best thing ever isn't always likely to happen, having it on the table can help
you approach new tasks with a positive mindset.
- Remember Your Positive Qualities;
- Practice Positive Self-talk;
- Question Why You Tell Yourself No;
2. TAKING ACTION;
- Keep Nurturing Company;
Pay
attention to the friends you keep and their attitudes about others, themselves,
and you. If you start noticing that the majority of your friends are highly
critical, criticizing clothing, body, decisions, speech, or behavior on a daily
basis, you may want to seek less judgmental friends. Try instead to find people
who have nice things to say about others and are not quick to pass judgement.
While having a few negative friends is perfectly fine, if you are surrounded by
negativity, even if it is not directed at you, you are absorbing its effects.
- Be More Forgiving Of Others;
Ø Do not be quick to pass judgment, yourself. Trying to put
others down may seem like it raises you up, but really, every time you knock
someone else down, you are also criticizing a quality you possess and are
knocking yourself down, too. Instead, raise others up. Not only will you have
better luck making friends and having meaningful relationships, but you will
also be elevating yourself. If you find yourself condemning other's failures or decisions,
think about why you are doing so. If your initial thought is "because
they're wrong," think a little harder. Why is it wrong? In what context?
Is it your cultural background or how you were raised that makes you think so?
- Do One Thing That Excites You Everyday;
Ø It doesn't have to be dangerous -- just go to a part of town
you've never been to on your own and go into a random store. See what you find
there. Try talking to the clerk. The more new and exciting experiences you rack
up, the more likely you are to be excited by life instead of being scared of
new things or new people. If you know that you're capable of doing exciting
things every day, then you'll stop thinking that anything you try will end in
failure.
- Address The Flaws You Can Address;
- Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People;
One of the best ways to guarantee
that you'll be insecure is to compare yourself to the people you know, or even
to the people you see on television. If you do that, you're sure to find a way
to make yourself feel ugly, poor, unsuccessful, or a number of other
unflattering things just because you feel like you can never measure up to
other people. Instead, focus on the things that would make your life better by
your own standards, not by anyone else's.
If you try hard
enough, you'll always be able to find someone who is healthier, wealthier, and
wiser than you are. But chances are, there are many people who wish they were
more like you in some ways, too. The grass is always greener, and the person
who you may think is perfect and has it all together may be wishing he or she
were someone else.
- Talk It Out With A Close Friend;
One way to overcome your
insecurities is to talk them over with a close friend. Having someone who knows
and understands you can help you get an unbiased perspective, and can make you
feel like your worries or fears are irrational. A good friend will cheer you
on, tell you that you can achieve your goals, and can help you dispel any of
the negativity and doubt that surrounds your life. Sometimes, talking something out is half the
battle to solving it. You may be feeling worse because you've been bottling
your insecurities up inside you.
- Work To Excel At Something;
If you want to feel better
about yourself, then one way to do it is to be good at something. It can be
dancing, writing short stories, painting, telling jokes, or being a whiz at
foreign languages. It doesn't matter what it is; what matters is that you've
devoted enough time and energy into something that you can say, "Hey, I'm
really good at this." Making the effort to succeed at something and making
the commitment to do it regularly can definitely help you feel good about
yourself. To be clear, you
shouldn't aim to be the best soccer player on the field or the sharpest student
in math class to impress other people. You should do it to make yourself proud.
- Learn To Laugh At Yourself;
In general, people who are
insecure take themselves pretty seriously. They are always worrying about
failing or embarrassing themselves. People who have a good sense of humor about
themselves and understand that everyone makes a fool of himself from time to
time tend to be more secure, because they accept that they will mess up
sometimes and are okay with it. You should learn to laugh at yourself, and to
make jokes if something didn't go as planned, instead of worrying about coming
off looking good all the time. It'll be a big relief to face the day with more
laughter and less worries about everything going perfectly. This doesn't mean that you should be super
self-deprecating and laugh at your own expense all the time. But it does mean
that you should treat yourself more lightly and with more forgiveness; if you
laugh at yourself, people will feel more comfortable around you because they
won't be afraid of offending you all the time, and you'll find that you feel
more comfortable with yourself in return.
- Get As Much Information As You Can;
One reason you may be feeling insecure is because you hate
dealing with uncertainty. You may not know what to expect at a party, in a new
class, or during a trip where you won't know many people. While you can't
predict what may happen in a given situation, you can make yourself feel a bit
better by gathering more information about it so you feel a bit more in
control. This will help you feel more secure about what's going to happen.
- Remember That You're Not Alone;
And with that, we have come to the end of our discussions on Insecurity.... I hope these tips were helpful? Now it's your turn..... Was there anytime you were insecure about something? How did you react? How did you walk through it and overcome it? I'd love to hear from you.....
Till the next time I see you, Stay Beautiful& Handsome
PEACE, LOVE& CHOCOLATES
XOXO
Mi lovely Esther mami, I gotta be honest eh...I love how you took your time to educate people on insecurity and how to handle it...buh lemme say this eh....Some people are so gaddamn insecure bout themselves that even if, you write them a book, they are never gonna come out of it...You see, I would like to think that Human beings can be WHOEVER they wanna be.....the ONLY person in the world that can stop you is YOU....I also believe that YOU have to take the trip to the beach to leave your footprint on the sand of time cuz the beach isn't gonna come to you.... You see, insecure people will never go far in life UNLESS they come out of their shells....and until they realize that, they are just gonna be existing instead of living....#myopinion
ReplyDeleteGreat post! Someone needs to read this
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this
ReplyDelete1000 likes for this post. Thumbs up @esther
ReplyDelete#mannie
I love this. Insecurity is an often taken for granted topic, but it is very rampant. :D
ReplyDeleteWe need to address it as it is usually the cause of many relationship problems.
I hardly laugh at myself lol I sure will learn that and also writing down my fear.
ReplyDeleteFashionitazbybuiti.blogspot.com
I love this post.. especially the party about writing down your fears and asking yourself what's the worse that could happen. This is something I battle with a lot and I know better. I believe jotting it down on paper will make all the difference. Thank you
ReplyDeleteAsh,
www.AshleyTamarra.com