#RANTS || I AM TIRED

*grabs megaphone* "1,2... Testing 1,2"

Hi humans!! This is my first official rant and I'd say it's been a long time coming. See ehn, this matter I want to complain about has been worrying me since, and I thought I could stick to updating BBM
and Facebook statuses to let it out. But this week, it was like the gods of stupidity descended/ ascended like a vulture from hell and rested on some people, and as I couldn't take it anymore, I have decided to pour it all out here. In fact, cos of this particular matter, my sexuality has been questioned.

You see, I am tired of the female gender. I don't know what it is with females *in Kanye West's voice*. I get the once in a while "damsel in distress", it's a totally classic move to get them men eating from our palms, but when it becomes a routine, then it loses its purpose and turns boring and annoying. How on earth do you sit ur fat or flat bum in one place and expect your every need to be met by men? Is it them that born you? Is it them that carry you come world?

The one that has my heart broken into tiny shreds is the way these scriptwriters portray females as weak, needy, clingy and all of that. Or when they manage to portray us as strong, independent and the sorts, they never fail to include the part when she meets a guy and all her willpower and all she's been working for fades into the background. Then we laugh and call it "mumu button skills". See ehn, the joke is no longer funny cos in the real sense of it all, I don't think these things actually happen, in fact, I don't see these things happening. To crown it all up, one girl will sit in her room and watch it, then tell you that she wants to live dat way, who does that biko? How many boys, guys or men do you see going around living their lives the way they saw Jim Iyke or Brad Pitt act in one movie or the other? I am yet to meet any, have you?

Another thing these scriptwriters keep including in most of their scripts that never ceases to irritate me, is these girls, ladies leaving the altars where they're supposed to be getting married to human beings to go meet some asshole who wasn't man enough to fight to keep them while they had them. I get the sacrificial love thingy o buy why have I never seen or heard of a movie where a guy would run out of the church or whatever to go back to his ex girlfriend?

Finally, how hard is it to read signs sistaz? All your statuses on all your social media accounts are screaming how much you love him or how you hate him for not calling you, or how you don't trust him, blah blah blah.... you've changed all your profile pictures of him or of you both.... none of his statuses tell us anything about you, in fact all the young man talks about is his career.... his profile pictures are either of him, his fam and every other girl but you.... yet you still don't get it? I think you deserve a left-handed slap to return your brain to factory settings. 

As I was about to write "XOXO", I remembered this picture below and I said I must share 

Shey you know that anybody can boil rice and feed you as food all in the name of white rice? But you see this jollof rice ehn, it actually needs extra skills and expertise to produce jollof rice. In that manner, never forget you deserve jollof rice and to be treated like a pot of it too.

My name is Esther, and I am tired!!!